Your First Time Getting High

By Brian Lemay No comments


– Hello. – Hey. I have to go grab Madison
real quick because she forgot her pass, so I’ll be right
back, but sit, please. – Okay. Ooh, brownies, oh my
god, they look so good. – And I was like, “That’s
not what it means at all.” – Oh, I know.
– Yeah. – These are so good. – Wow, someone must need
to relieve a lot of stress. – Yeah, well brownies are
like my favorite thing ever. – Oh no. Oh, okay. Bridget, those are special brownies. – How many have you had? (uncertainly grunts) They’re weed brownies. (upbeat music) – Oh shit, oh shit, oh
shit, oh shit, oh shit. – No, no no no, don’t even worry about it, it’s gonna be totally fine. – Yeah, you know what, it probably didn’t even affect you that much. I’m gonna have one too! – Yeah.
– But you know, I’m only gonna have half because we
made these really strong. – Yeah. I’ll have half too though,
okay, this is gonna be fun. – Yeah. – Yeah, you’re right, it’s gonna be fine. Is this my face? (whimsical music) – Hey where’d Madison go? – I have a face.
– Madison? – You have a nice face.
– I do? (ominous music) – They’re listening. – I’m hungry, you wanna get some food? – I can’t swallow, how do you swallow? What if I suffocate? – No, you gotta stay alive
for the chicken tenders, they are so good. – I can’t feel my arms,
do I still have arms? – Yes.
– I want my mum! Just so beautiful, look
at its patterns, its form. – You should probably have some water. – Oh.
– [Woman] Oops. (laughs) – Okay, but it’s not like that funny, okay it’s kinda funny, yeah. (laughs) (upbeat music) – I need ranch. Are you gonna be okay? Okay. They only had bleu
cheese, which is insane. Oh my god. That’s gonna come back to haunt you later. – Why are we even on this planet? – Well Bridget, I’m glad
you brought this up. See, I’ve been thinking about this a lot and I feel like the
universe is like an aquarium and we are all the killer whales. So I should probably
road trip across America because that’s what makes
the most sense in this world. Sorry, I’m rambling a
lot, I just really like talking to you Bridget, in
fact I think that I like you more than a friend and I’m sorry if that’s weird but that’ just how I… feel. Well that’s probably for the best. Bridget, Bridget, come one,
let’s get you home, let’s go. (gentle orchestral music) (gasps) Where have you been? (laughs) – I went to get ice cream.

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