Top 10 Things Not To Drink While Cycling

By Brian Lemay 100 comments


Hello? Yep. No, I’m out on a ride. Yep, I’ll
call you back love. It’s OK, I’m fine. Alright, see you later. Bye! Here’s GCN’s Top 10 things not to drink on
a bike. Soup The bicycle, as wonderful a device as it is,
is no place for proper soup consumption. Matt, why have you brought soup? In a bowl? Couldn’t put it in a bidon could I? It’s all
chunky! Chunky vegetable. I forgot all my bread rolls. Matt, come on. A man of your experience – how
are you still forgetting stuff? I know…I’ve brought my fork as well! Oh cheers Si, thanks very much. Mmm, that’s gorgeous! Beer Just because beer is the world’s most consumed
alcoholic beverage and indeed the third most consumed drink of all, behind water and tea,
this doesn’t give you enough reason to use it as a rehydration aid out on the road. I do like a good, creamy head. Same here. *If you like Piña Colada*
*And getting caught in the rain* This exotic, tropical rum-based cocktail has
been the official beverage of Puerto Rico since 1978 and was made even more famous by
the song ‘The Escape’, better known as the ‘The Piña Colada Song’. *…I’m the love that you’ve looked for, write
to me and escape…Ooo hoo hoo hoo!* Supersize Coke Musettes can sometimes be full of surprises… Hope there’s a cheeky little coke in there,
Si. What have we got? …but a supersize coke certainly isn’t something
you’d expect to find. What the heck is that? Or the bucket, as it’s commonly known in cinemas
throughout the world. Not on the open roads. It’s really nice though. Oh! Champagne Unless you’re the winner of a Grand Tour celebrating with teammates whilst being snapped by the world’s press, quaffing champagne
whilst out on your racer is simply just showing off and winning a Strava segment won’t quite
cut it either. Cheers Matt. To Strava. To talent! Tea from a pot I’m about to blow. I need a bottle alright,
can you get me a bottle? Nowhere in the history books has there been
any mention of tea being taken out on a ride. Ah god. Sorry Si, I’ve had a 10km chase. Lloydy
wanted crumpets! Seriously Matt, if you’re going to be a domestique,
you’re going to have to get a little bit fitter, alright? If this is Earl Grey then you’re probably
in luck. I thought you wanted breakfast tea? Oh for god’s sake Matt! That’s what Lloydy
wants, Lloydy likes breakfast tea! Milkshake A little bit overboard with the straws, Matt. Well it’s all in the preparation, I just wanted
to make it an occasion. A milkshake’s a treat, it’s something to look forward to. It takes
you back to your childhood, to your youth, and I’ve done my best! Well, you can only do your best, Matt. Do you want some of mine? No! Coffee I could really, really do with a coffee right
now. The café is not for miles. We all know that coffee is best taken when
sat down and I don’t mean in the saddle. Legend! Si, do you take sugar? I do actually. We’re well aware of coffee’s addictive
qualities – just don’t let it get to you that much. It must be like the coffee equivalent of sous-vide
– it’s just been cooking gently at 37.5ºC in your back pocket. There’s explosions on the back of my tongue,
Si. That might be something else, Matt. Power Smoothie Well, how do we get one of those? Luckily, I came prepared. All I need – and I didn’t bring one with me
– is a blender. You couldn’t sort me out with one, could you? Yeah, hang on a sec. Cheers Si, thanks very much! I just need myself something else. Hello? Yep. No, I’m out on a ride. Feel a bit more prepared now, Si, so let’s
give it a plunge. Fresh as the driven snow, sir. Oh, cheers Matt! Hearty and nutritious… Oh we’re not moving! …and we haven’t even stopped. That is amazing. I feel like Chris Froome! Fizzy drinks in your bidon. Carbonated drinks have carbon dioxide dissolved
into them, and as such are held in vessels designed specifically to withstand the resulting
pressure. Not a bidon. Unless you want a small, sticky explosion
a couple of minutes into your training. Oh yeah… The golden stuff I’ve sliced my pineapple, I’m happy to go
in. Let’s give it a plunge. I can’t get the pineapple out mate. We’ll get one for you later!

100 Comments

GoPro Nerd

Jan 1, 2016, 12:07 am Reply

I'd go for a beer in the north york moors, cant think of a better place to enjoy one!

Motarded421

Jan 1, 2016, 2:20 am Reply

I don't know how I feel about those tiny coffee cups. Seems like way to much work to get your coffee fix

Cat From The Future

Feb 2, 2016, 9:08 pm Reply

"Small, sticky explosion." ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Brian Cartoscelli

Feb 2, 2016, 5:44 am Reply

funniest guys ever! great, Audrey. You blokes got what it takes. Except you guys need a ride a classic steel road bike

Qiuyuan Chen

Mar 3, 2016, 1:35 am Reply

We had one rider last season when we have a mid point stop one bottle he puts coke the other he put something like Red bull. Then we say nothing but we went though a bad road section where he is the last rider and we ride for few minutes, doing 35k/h and his bottle just blew off the cap and he had to ride home with coke soaked shorts and red bull shoes. Then he never do that again.

Shunt Harvey Ricafort

May 5, 2016, 4:04 pm Reply

Mostly Dranked Liquids 1st Water 3rd beer. and the second is COFFEE! Definitely NOT TEA. Say Yes to caffeine!

London Weekend TV

May 5, 2016, 12:08 am Reply

Who needs Monty Python when we've got GCN!

Matthieu Huot

Jun 6, 2016, 12:15 am Reply

You guys are hilarious!

Bockplumpi

Jul 7, 2016, 11:52 pm Reply

typically British humor :), love it!!

catboxcadaver

Aug 8, 2016, 10:30 pm Reply

beyond funny

Erlangga

Aug 8, 2016, 9:49 pm Reply

Which one is better. Carbon or Alumunium?

Gabriel Lopez

Aug 8, 2016, 5:50 pm Reply

Brilliant!

Stu Wright

Sep 9, 2016, 10:31 am Reply

42secs he conveniently had a bread roll handy in his back pocket lol.

Sakis Kefallinos

Oct 10, 2016, 8:25 am Reply

the best chanel in YouTube

Modern Medicine

Oct 10, 2016, 7:38 pm Reply

small sticky explosion :^)

Joshua Dickin

Oct 10, 2016, 3:49 pm Reply

what helmet brand do you wair

Tunc Can

Dec 12, 2016, 7:35 pm Reply

What not to eat beautiful

ArSa Cuevas

Jan 1, 2017, 2:52 am Reply

my bidon once blew up with beer, you just need to keep the nib open and ride gently…wich is hard as fuck while drunk xD hahahahahahahahaha

MrRp25

Jan 1, 2017, 4:49 pm Reply

As a newbie, I've been downing a couple of beers and a shot or two of JD before riding around my Canadian town this January. Do you foresee anything going wrong, and does it hurt when you fall into a snowbank whilst drunk?

Ali 1

Feb 2, 2017, 6:43 pm Reply

Guys please wear pants under your bike shorts becuse i could see your
Balls at the champagne part when u were fizzing it

Popa Nicolae

Mar 3, 2017, 8:51 pm Reply

Have a radler In your backpack. It won't bite!

Marcio Peixoto

Mar 3, 2017, 9:58 pm Reply

?????

Des Kelly

Mar 3, 2017, 9:42 am Reply

Funny

aaronJSHW

Mar 3, 2017, 8:14 am Reply

I wish I had a water bottle on my bike…

MUHAMAD IRFAAN

Mar 3, 2017, 12:46 am Reply

stick to mineral water

techCC

Apr 4, 2017, 10:26 pm Reply

Drink riding should be against the law… xD

Gammareign

Apr 4, 2017, 12:21 am Reply

Couldn't drinking alcohol and biking incur legal troubles?

Alan Wood

Apr 4, 2017, 8:11 am Reply

i tend not to drInk anything that will get me a DUI.

kasa

May 5, 2017, 9:48 pm Reply

I would be cool to have drones deliver stuff to riders 😛

Magisteerium

May 5, 2017, 6:10 pm Reply

I would add poison to this list.

Pascal Harris

May 5, 2017, 5:50 am Reply

At the end of a sportive, when riding home, I have tried drinking tea. The trouble is that the motion of the bike and the rubbing on the bottle cage causes the paper cup to fail within a couple of miles. And hot drinks in a water bottle always taste of plastic. Not nice. More experimentation required.

MUHAMAD IRFAAN

May 5, 2017, 2:49 pm Reply

man british humour

justas drigotas

May 5, 2017, 9:32 pm Reply

wait… beer doesn't hydrate you, it makes you wanna pee so you get in fact dehydrated.

Ufuk Ercan

Jun 6, 2017, 5:33 pm Reply

even froome drink beer while cycling

Liz Carroll

Jun 6, 2017, 8:35 am Reply

Love it!

andylg43

Jun 6, 2017, 8:25 pm Reply

Best GCN video ever!

hcw199

Jun 6, 2017, 2:06 am Reply

not funny and not informative

chiupo lini

Jun 6, 2017, 2:04 pm Reply

I never drink beer in the middle of a long ride, especially in a hot summer day. A group of us did that during a break for lunch, and on the return ride, all of us who drank beer got a heat stroke while the few who did not drink beer got away with nothing. Beer actually dehydrate instead of rehydrate when you are riding in a hot and humid weather. You may of course drink like a fish after the ride.

Eoghan

Jun 6, 2017, 5:14 pm Reply

i drink iced coffee on a ride

Brett Deriso

Jun 6, 2017, 2:23 pm Reply

Tea service! SPLENDID!

Rohit Chaudhary

Jul 7, 2017, 7:06 am Reply

you know what I miss my father he left me when I was 9.. peace.:(

Javier Marquez

Jul 7, 2017, 10:02 am Reply

Are these guys pros? Or just bros?

llluM3nati

Jul 7, 2017, 2:25 am Reply

nooo not the specialized venge

Thorneyed

Jul 7, 2017, 1:17 am Reply

I DRINK YOUR MILKSHAKE!

henri best

Aug 8, 2017, 3:08 am Reply

Champagne in a coupette ?

Jelmer Vogelzang

Aug 8, 2017, 3:19 pm Reply

The question is whether you eat or drink soup…

Christopher Jenkins

Aug 8, 2017, 4:36 pm Reply

I ONLY DRINK FUCKIN WHISKYYY!

Rick Sanchez

Aug 8, 2017, 4:44 pm Reply

I usually drink the blood of my fallen enemies when I go for a ride ☺

Jonghui Lee

Aug 8, 2017, 12:58 pm Reply

4:25 did anyone did that… I did, sticky legs

Matthew Currie

Aug 8, 2017, 4:25 pm Reply

I absolutely love your top tens

david wright

Aug 8, 2017, 3:07 am Reply

I thought the pizza box was funny until I saw the tea service….I am literally crying. Pure comedy genius.

cbf edge

Aug 8, 2017, 9:12 am Reply

I ride with lemonade all the time. Just be careful when opening the bidon!

FlakeyJakey

Aug 8, 2017, 7:52 am Reply

Thats considered huge in england? Thats a medium in american movie theaters.

oscar ascencio

Sep 9, 2017, 1:15 pm Reply

No beer?

Tequila okay?

Stuart Woodburn

Sep 9, 2017, 11:53 am Reply

where do you lot get your ideas, I was crying laughing as I put fizzy water in my hydration pack and made a nice fountain on a MTBike.

fjoa123

Oct 10, 2017, 10:55 pm Reply

does gcn have a video on how to fall more safely (with clip-less pedals)

oreosaysb00

Oct 10, 2017, 8:45 am Reply

Lol I put soda in my water bottle and have had no problems whatsoever

Byron Pratt

Nov 11, 2017, 12:59 am Reply

2:30 only in England

Jake Garrett

Nov 11, 2017, 2:03 am Reply

So I broke 2 of those. Found out the hard way with carbonated drinks on my beautiful white Bianchi, wondered how my shorts got wet with no puddles in sight and found out the lid blew off getting sticky CocaCola everywhere, ruining a the nice wax job on the bike… Then the other wasn't so bad, had some Arnold Palmer (half sweet tea, half lemonade) during a Criterium, one of the judges asked "is that beer or Arnold Palmer?". I don't know how they knew, must be tea fans as well.

Xarx

Dec 12, 2017, 5:28 pm Reply

Whaaaaat, some british people who are refusing tea?! ^^

OreChuks Obadofin

Dec 12, 2017, 11:40 pm Reply

They we just enjoying themselves…

Sausage Egg & Cheese McGriddle

Jan 1, 2018, 2:37 pm Reply

I ship Matt and Si, is that weird

Isaac Kovack

Jan 1, 2018, 9:12 pm Reply

these men are so lucky that this is their job. I wonder if they have a side job or if this is their main job

Angel Chavez

Feb 2, 2018, 4:25 pm Reply

You two are the funniest guys ever.

Ethan Chin

Feb 2, 2018, 8:25 am Reply

Where was that blender plugged into? O_o

Dimas Aditya

Mar 3, 2018, 12:08 am Reply

I was expecting a normal review. But this is surprising hilarious. Niiice

Paul W

Mar 3, 2018, 9:58 am Reply

Thanks for the laugh ??

Erik Guevara

May 5, 2018, 3:21 pm Reply

Ahh thank you guys. I had a good time with this video!

Blue Dragon

May 5, 2018, 8:05 pm Reply

It's official… this is top gear for cyclists.

Siddharth Salkar

Jun 6, 2018, 4:06 am Reply

That bowl needs its own twitter

Ana Simoes

Jun 6, 2018, 7:52 pm Reply

soup on the bike???

xCristi

Jun 6, 2018, 7:59 pm Reply

Votka

Varad Mahatme

Jun 6, 2018, 10:51 am Reply

Rip front brakes 1:53

Tae Young Ahn

Jul 7, 2018, 4:12 pm Reply

Don't you take soup in a thermos on your winter rides?

Ivan Schekoldin

Jul 7, 2018, 11:07 am Reply

No soup on a bike? Give me a brake!

But at least you haven't mentioned vodka.

Tómas Karlsson

Jul 7, 2018, 7:47 pm Reply

Matt is missed???

seanathan1996

Aug 8, 2018, 3:39 pm Reply

I believe they make coffee flavored jellies for this exact reason

P Thayer

Aug 8, 2018, 2:59 pm Reply

Couldn't help but notice So did not partake in the beer, please tell me he's not the one Englishman that doesn't like the wonderful taste of a crisp cold……..sorry thinking American there for a second where we've learned you only drink cold beer while riding a bike.

Gasoil4ever

Aug 8, 2018, 9:16 am Reply

Loved it ????‍♂️?

Jon

Oct 10, 2018, 2:18 pm Reply

Getting pissed drunk while cycling. Haha

Will K

Nov 11, 2018, 1:04 pm Reply

Tea in a bidon sounds pretty good

Predrag Radnic

Nov 11, 2018, 1:57 pm Reply

Very stupid clip

Retro Dude, Old man on his bikes

Jan 1, 2019, 6:17 pm Reply

Must try a yard of ale next ride

Daddy D

Feb 2, 2019, 10:16 pm Reply

I totally died seeing him holding a bowl of soup while riding. HAHAHAAHAHAHHAHH

Mike T

Feb 2, 2019, 7:25 pm Reply

Ahh, British humour and innuendo at its best. ?

Randy Eller

Feb 2, 2019, 7:59 pm Reply

I can hear the uproar from the Californians when they see all those straws! The fizzy drinks one reminds me of my first beginners mistake years ago. Lesson learned, I still drink them from the proper screw lid bottles they come in. Fits in the bottle cage and I don't get a caffeine deficiency headache!

Ray Ray TV

Mar 3, 2019, 12:49 am Reply

This is a terrible video. Who would drink alcoholic drinks during rides? Kinda pointing out the obvious!!

Line B

Jun 6, 2019, 8:23 am Reply

Laughing so hard at this ??? I'm having so much fun watching it and I can't even begin to imagine how much fun you all had making the video ?????

Big Boss

Jun 6, 2019, 2:06 pm Reply

i just like GCN VIBE.

steemdup

Jun 6, 2019, 10:03 pm Reply

the full tea service LMAO!!!

ygtcbee23

Jul 7, 2019, 3:32 am Reply

2:15 GCN Gold!!! Absolutely hilarious

Connor Marciniak

Jul 7, 2019, 1:45 pm Reply

That’s like a whole medium soda in the USA

Omar Tan

Jul 7, 2019, 5:40 pm Reply

Saw snapshot, saw Matt, press play, miss Matt ?

Joseph Bleasdale

Jul 7, 2019, 8:54 pm Reply

“Lloydey wanted crumpets” ???

Joseph Bleasdale

Jul 7, 2019, 8:55 pm Reply

Wait…where’s the blender plugged in? ???

Asuma Sarutobi

Aug 8, 2019, 7:17 pm Reply

Can you make a 10 video for using nicotine/tobacco products on a ride? (From the inoccuous using dip or nicorette gum to the obnoxious like setting up an entire hookah? XD)

Joseph Bleasdale

Sep 9, 2019, 12:23 am Reply

Would have loved to have been in a car going the other way on that day. Two blokes on bikes drinking piña coladas in martini glasses before one puts an entire tea set on his back for whatever reason ?

Joseph Bleasdale

Sep 9, 2019, 12:23 am Reply

Would have loved to have been in a car going the other way on that day. Two blokes on bikes drinking piña coladas in martini glasses before one puts an entire tea set on his back for whatever reason ?

Jeff Portwood

Oct 10, 2019, 10:29 pm Reply

Stupid

John Wick

Nov 11, 2019, 6:57 am Reply

how many turtles did y'all kill with the straws lmao

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